10 Principles for Peace of Mind

(Maryam Bari, Lahore)

Life is long and full of challenges. Most of those challenges are internal, and depends on how WE choose to accept and interpret them. Our lives can go on very different paths, depending on what we do and how we look at what happens to us along the way. Here are 10 points of advice that if followed, will guarantee a better life, one that brings with it true peace of mind.

1. Do Not Interfere In Others' Business Unless Asked.

Most of us create our own problems by interfering too often in others'affairs. We do so because somehow we have convinced ourselves that our way is the best way, our logic is the perfect logic and those who do not conform to our thinking must be criticized and steered to the right direction, our direction. No two human beings can think or act inexactly the same way. Mind your own business and you will keep your peace.

2. Forgive And Forget.

This is the most powerful aid to peace of mind. We often develop ill feelings inside our heart for the person who insults us or harms us. We nurture grievances. This in turn results in loss of sleep, development of stomach ulcers, and high blood pressure. This insult or injury was done once, but nourishing of grievance goes on forever by constantly remembering it. Get over this bad habit. Life is too short to waste on such trifles. Forgive, forget, and march on. Love flourishes with giving and forgiving.

3. Do Not Crave Recognition.

This world is full of selfish people. They seldom praise anybody without selfish motives. They may praise you today because you are in power, but no sooner than you are powerless, they will forget your achievement and will start finding faults in you. Their recognition is not worth the aggravation. Do your duties ethically and sincerely.

4. Do Not succumb to envy and jealousy.

We all have experienced how envy can disturb our peace of mind. You know that you work harder than your colleagues in the office, but sometimes they get promotions; you do not. You started a business several years ago, but you are not as successful as your neighbor whose business is only one year old. There are several examples like these in everyday life. Should you envy?

No. Remember everybody's life is shaped by his/her destiny, which has now become his/her reality. Nothing will be gained by blaming others for your misfortune. Jealousy will not get you anywhere, it will only take away your peace of mind.

5. Change Yourself According To The Environment.

If you try to change the environment single-handedly, chances are you will fail. Instead, change yourself to suit your environment. As you do this, even the environment, which has been unfriendly to you, will mysteriously change and seem more congenial and harmonious with your goals.

6. Endure What Cannot Be Cured.

This is the best way to turn a disadvantage into an advantage. Every day we face numerous inconveniences, ailments, irritations, and accidents that are beyond our control. If we cannot control them or change them, we must learn to put up with these things. We must learn to endure them cheerfully. Believe in yourself and you will gain in terms of patience, inner strength and will power.

7. Do Not Bite Off More Than You Can Chew.

This maxim needs to be remembered constantly. We often tend to take more responsibilities than we are capable of carrying out. This is done to satisfy our ego. Know your limitations. Why take on additional loads that may create more worries? You cannot gain peace of mind by expanding your external activities. Reduce your material engagements and spend time in prayer, introspection and meditation. This will reduce those thoughts in your mind that make you restless. An uncluttered mind will produce greater feelings of peace.

8. Meditate Regularly.

Meditation calms the mind and gets rid of disturbing thoughts. This is the highest state of peace of mind. Try and experience it yourself. If you meditate earnestly for half an hour everyday, your mind will tend to become peaceful during the remaining twenty three and a half hours. Your mind will not be as easily disturbed as it was before. You would benefit by gradually increasing the period of daily meditation. You may think that this will interfere with your daily work. On the contrary, this will increase your efficiency and you will be able to produce better results in less time.

9. Never Leave The Mind Vacant.

An empty mind is the devil's workshop. All evil actions start in the vacant mind. Keep your mind occupied in something positive, something worthwhile. Actively follow a hobby. Do something that holds your interest. You must decide what you value more: money or peace of mind. Your hobby, like social work or charity work, may not always earn you more money, but you will have a sense of fulfillment and achievement.

10. Do Not Procrastinate And Never Regret.

Do not waste time in protracted wondering �Should I or shouldn't I?� Days, weeks, months, and years may be wasted in that futile mental debating. You can never plan enough because you can never anticipate all future happenings. Value your time and do the things that need to be done. It does not matter if you fail the first time. You can learn from your mistakes and succeed the next time. Sitting back and worrying will lead to nothing. Learn from your mistakes, but do not brood over the past.

DO NOT REGRET. Whatever happened was destined to happen only that way. Why cry over spilled milk?

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Mariam Bari
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