A human being suffers a lot of
unpleasant stressful moments all along his / her life. These are social,
financial, physical, spiritual, mental and emotional .Human nature is different
from each other in many ways. Some of us can deal with these problems and
situations tactfully, diligently in a cool, composed and calm way, while others
are out of control; lose their temper and patience to these volatile situations.
They get angry, annoyed, depressed, sometimes harm their own selves, loved ones
and kith and kin. Some of these situations are quite drastic and devastating,
like losing a loved one has no parallel compromise. Stress management is a big
topic these days. So many mental, psychological and physical diseases are
directly related to stress. Pressure and stress are the same thing and keeping
cool under these situations is a daunting task.
A Muslim has the guiding light from Allah SWT for controlling and dealing these
situations with patience and self-control seeking the mercy of Allah SWT .In
Quran there are various Ayas which ask us to be patient, steadfast and
self-controlled.
Dua : Supplication, Asking mercy and blessings of Allah is the biggest blessing
and armor for a believer. Allah loves those who ask and beg him for his
blessings, forgiveness and help with all their humility in private, in
congregation, standing, lying and in every position. The Prophet saws said:
Allah is angry with those who do not ask Him for anything (Tirmidhi). The
Prophet saws once said that in prayer, you would find rest and relief (Nasai).
He would also regularly ask for God’s forgiveness and remain in prostration
during prayer praising God (Tasbeeh) and asking for His forgiveness (Bukhari).We
should pray to Allah SWT in our Salaat (obligatory prayers) or in the extra
prayers ( nawafil) seek his help and mercy all the time. Believe me for a
bereaved person Allah the exalted is the best companion, safe guard and one
feels so strong and relieved with close ties to Allah swt. As much as you get
closer to Allah you feel the peace, tranquility and strength from inside. That
strength is apparent in your all dealings and matters. Allah the exalted say in
Quran,
وَلَنَبۡلُوَنَّكُم بِشَىۡءٍ۬ مِّنَ ٱلۡخَوۡفِ وَٱلۡجُوعِ وَنَقۡصٍ۬ مِّنَ
ٱلۡأَمۡوَٲلِ وَٱلۡأَنفُسِ وَٱلثَّمَرَٲتِۗ وَبَشِّرِ ٱلصَّـٰبِرِينَ (١٥٥)
ٱلَّذِينَ إِذَآ أَصَـٰبَتۡهُم مُّصِيبَةٌ۬ قَالُوٓاْ إِنَّا لِلَّهِ وَإِنَّآ
إِلَيۡهِ رَٲجِعُونَ (١٥٦))
And certainly, We shall test you with something of fear, hunger, loss of wealth,
lives and fruits, but give glad tidings to As-Sâbirun (the patient) (155) Who,
when afflicted with calamity, say: "Truly! To Allâh we belong and truly, to Him
we shall return." (156)
For a believer Muslim there is no such a guarantee that he or she will go
through life without tests and trials. Rather we notice that the believers are
tested more harshly by society, by regimes, by simple luck and destiny. But
Allah says that a Muslim should be patient, steadfast and in full control of his
emotions. In the next Ayah glad tidings is given to those patient people.
أُوْلَـٰٓٮِٕكَ عَلَيۡہِمۡ صَلَوَٲتٌ۬ مِّن رَّبِّهِمۡ وَرَحۡمَةٌ۬ۖ
وَأُوْلَـٰٓٮِٕكَ هُمُ ٱلۡمُهۡتَدُونَ (١٥٧)
They are those on whom are the Salawât (i.e. who are blessed and will be
forgiven) from their Lord, and (they are those who) receive His Mercy, and it is
they who are the guided-ones. (157)
To be patient to calamities and in drastic situations is the same as keeping
cool under pressure and this is how Islam guides us. Patience and prayer are two
stress busters. Sabr is often translated as patience but it is not just that. It
includes self-control, perseverance, endurance, and a focused struggle to
achieve one’s goal. Unlike patience, which implies resignation, the concept of
Sabr includes a duty to remain steadfast to achieve your goals despite all odds.
Being patient gives us control in situations where we feel we have little or no
control. ‘We cannot control what happens to us but we can control our reaction
to our circumstances, problems, sufferings and calamities. Patience helps us
keep our mind and attitude towards our difficulties in check. With our firm
belief and Eemaan we know that despite all our efforts ultimate good or bad will
happen from Allah swt, he is the wise the all-knowing. We should put our trust
in him and should work hard for betterment but leave the end result in his
hands. Sometimes our limited human knowledge is unable to comprehend His wisdom
behind what happens to us and to others, but knowing that He is in control and
that as human beings we submit to His Will, enriches our humanity and enhances
our obedience towards him.
Life is short: when we are caught up in our own stress and anxiety. We should
remember that our life is short and temporary, and that the everlasting life is
in the Hereafter, this will put our worries in perspective and least bothered.
This belief in the life of this world reminds us that whatever difficulties,
trials, anxieties, and grief we suffer in this world are, Insha Allah, something
we will only experience for a short period of time. And more importantly, if we
handle these tests with patience, Allah will reward us for it with enormous
rewards.
Remembrance of Allah (Zikr): In Quran it’s said "… without doubt in the
remembrance (Zikr) of Allah do hearts find tranquility" (Quran 13:28).
We can recite tasbeehat ( glorifying Allah SWT)as many times on our fingers, on
a rosary, in our heart, loud or quietly “Subhana Allahe wa be hamdihi, subhan
Allahil Azeem"is a very good tasbih. These are quite comprehensive in praising
Allah .The Prophet saws said , these two short phrases which are easy to say but
will weigh heavy on our scale of good deeds in the Hereafter.”
When ones heart feels heavy with stress, pressure or grief, remembrance of Allah
his Zikr is so comforting and relieving. Zikr refers to all forms of the
remembrance of Allah, including Salat, Tasbeeh, Tahmeed, Tahleel, making
supplication (Dua), and reading Quran.
"And your Lord says: ‘Call on me; I will answer your (prayer)…" (Quran 40:60)
By remembering Allah in the way He has taught us to do, we are more likely to
gain acceptance of our prayers and His Mercy in times of difficulty. We are
communicating with the only One Who not only Hears and Knows all, but who can
change our situation and give us the patience to deal with our difficulties and
ordeals.
"Remember Me, and I shall remember you; be grateful to me, and do not deny me"
(Quran 2:152).
Reading Quran: Keeping close contact to Quran is the same as Zikr .Reading and
listening to the Quran will help refresh our hearts and our minds. Recite it out
loud or in a low voice. Try to memorize it, learn the meanings, the
illustrations and it could be enjoyed at the most. When one is able to
understand Quran, then listening and doing tilawat (recitation) makes a lot more
sense. It seems like you are directly talking to Allah SWT.
"O humanity! There has come to you a direction from your Lord and a cure for all
[the ills] in men’s hearts - and for those who believe, a Guidance and a Mercy"
(Quran 10:57).
To be grateful!
For a believer it’s more important to be grateful to almighty all the time.
"If you are grateful, I will give you more" (Quran 14:7).
Counting our blessings helps us not only be grateful for what we have, but it
also reminds us that we are so much better off than millions of others, who have
gone through more drastic, devastating situations and deprived of so many things
that I am blessed with. And being grateful for all we have helps us maintain a
positive, cool attitude in the face of our pressures and challenges we are
facing almost daily.