Pakistan might be a ‘free’ and independent country as far as the legalities and autonomy are concerned but, are the people of the country really ‘free’? A country whose people are driven and bound by cultural taboos. So many of us bury our dreams, our thoughts, and sometimes our emotions in the fear of being judged by the people around us.
In our culture, it has always been the ones closest to you whom you fear opening up to. Be it your family members or your dearest of friends. We have been forced to normalize things that shouldn’t be so. In this article, I’d like to highlight a few of those issues which I feel should change in our society for the greater good in the longer term. The first of them being:
• The sense of insecurity when doing odd-jobs
As you grow up your expenses increase, be it related to your college fees or your daily living expenses when you need to socialize. There comes a point where it gets tough on your parents to manage your education expenses while also catering to your other needs. With time, it starts to affect your life in one way or the other. The stress and anxiety of missing out on social gatherings with your friends, because you cannot afford to spend too much money all the time, get big on you with time. This not only affects your social life but also negatively impacts your mental health as a teenager. And, the sole reason why it only gets worse from there is that we have never been encouraged by others around us to start earning from a young age. People here, in fear of being judged and looked down on by others, get reluctant to do those ‘odd jobs’. Be it working as a waiter in a restaurant, a receptionist or even working at a Call Centre. This is because our society considers it a somewhat ‘shameful’ thing to do and sadly, this has been a norm for far too long now. This is what needs to change and become normalized as soon as possible. It’s about time, we start focusing on ourselves and look for ways to fix issues that affect us rather than ignoring them because of the fact that it wouldn’t be ‘appreciated’ by society.
• Getting into peer pressure as a teenager
As a teenager, you want to fit in and do all the fun things which come your way. And who doesn’t want to have a good time with their friends? However, there’s a thin line between being indulged in activities that are fun and those which can have major consequences growing up. One major issue which is alarming these days is now of the number of teenagers taking up drugs as ‘fun’. It might seem fun at first but, sooner before you know it, it becomes a part of your life and you get addicted to it. This has been really common in college students here. And every now and then you get to hear a sad story of someone getting OD’d. The sad part about this is, most of them before getting into it clearly realize it’s a bad habit and it is not a good thing to do. Yet, due to the peer pressure and being judged by their friends for being ‘boring’ they are, in a way, forced to it. They try to act ‘cool’ to due to the fear of social unacceptance. There have been far too many examples about incidents which have led to a young person losing their life since they were forced to take up a pill. It all could have been different if you get the courage to say “NO”. Refraining from negative activities and straying away without caring about being judged, without giving it a second thought as to ‘would my friends accept me in their social circle or not’. This is what should be normalized.
What we can do as individuals to bring about a change
The short answer is: get comfortable with being uncomfortable. This is simply because it is always the morally right thing that we fear doing or feel awkward doing so. The fear of being looked upon ‘differently’ by others lets us down.
No matter how we try to perceive this issue, deep-down the root cause is always we, as individuals not prioritizing ourselves. It’s the reluctance to step out of our comfort zone which force us make decisions that any rational person wouldn’t have made. We have been confined to what our ‘culture’ perceives as normal. Or what our peers think as ‘normal’. Especially in Pakistan, it has always been about what ‘others will think’ of you if you do something out of the ‘norm’. Once you realize how easy it is to negate other’s unnecessary views, your life will become a lot easier. The key is to be confident in what you do and not let others (whose interference in your life is uncalled for) stop you from pursuing what you believe.
PREACH
To wrap it up, “Right is right, even if everyone is against it; and wrong is wrong, even if everyone is for it”.